So i was having an ok day unyil my mum open opened her mouth. So i spent valentine's with my best mate as you can see from my previous blog. I know feel guilty i forgot it was the day my uncle died but hey i have no sense of time anyway. I know the vague period but i dont need reminding. Ive spent years being the dutiful daughter taking care of my mum mourning for her, fighting her battles and its been fucking draining to be quite frank. She doesnt give a damn fuck whats happening in my life, unless it something she can disapprove of so you had sex before marriage - your screwed, do you even know anything about him? Are you thinking about what your getting yourself into? You left the religion- your a sinner. The bumps on your forhead are the devil come out of you, dont you think you should get the lump removed from under your other arm.
So what caused this post you might be asking well... Im sitting at the cafe and mum pipes up im glad you did something for valentines day with it being anniversary of Uncle Terry's death. Well i hadnt thought about it to be honest, as since then i had a relationship that went south and as i said in previous post i was with him last valentines day. That wasnt what made the cookie crumble tho when i said other things have happened since then she then said well you barely knew him anyway.
Well im sorry mum but where the fuck was you when he was getting lost and walking into the wrong rooms of the house, coming out of the toilet without his trousers up, where were you when i was battling with his step daughter to safeguarding him from my drunken aunt who was too drunk to feed him and he was too blind to feed himself, where were you when i was negotiating with social workers about his care when he ended up in fucking hospital, when a raging bitch of an alcoholic screaming shit at me down the phone for trying to protect my malnurished uncle, where were you when he got covid in hospital cos he was to fucking malnutrished to fight it and then he died. It didnt need to get to that, maybe if you got a fucking back bone sooner it never had to come to this. Yet maybe it did we will never know but im the youngest and it was never my job to take on all that, so i dont fucking deserve to be told when im living my life you didnt know him well enough.
I knew him well enough to see something was wrong and get over my own fears to do something about it, surely thats worth something.
Yes you can say sorry you have a bad memory but you remember what you want to.
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